I know he is better

August 2013

January 2014

I do not need to look at these pictures to know that Ranjan is much better. Actually in more ways than one he is back to his good old self! I never in my wildest dream thought that I would miss the 'ill' Ranjan but in some ways I do. Wonder why? When he was unwell and in his on own words 'felt that his system was falling apart' he was compliant as the most angelic child. He never grumbles, ate what you gave him, did not make any demands, came to which ever doc I took him too even the ayurved who limited his diet to rice and squashes! He swallowed pills and powders and brews, bore his chemo with remarkable courage. I knew he just wanted to be well again. And thank God he did. Forget remissions and similar medical jargon. I know he is well as he is back to his old self his favourite game: bantering with me. Oh he still has his brews and pills but not without a bit of jesting. Though he will eat what I give, his first answer to why 'what do you want for lunch/dinner' has to be raclette, achar meat or any of the things he loves but cannot still have. Cigars and Scottish water are also reasons to quip, all in great spirit but I who would have taken everything he threw at me till a few weeks back find myself reacting and feeling a little vexed.

But I know Ranjan, I know he is grateful and appreciative of all I have done and I know that all his jesting and quipping has another meaning altogether. But then am I not also prisoner of the faults and idiosyncrasies of a only child.

Must find a way out as we still have a long way to go. Maybe one raclette this winter would be a way out!