So let us talk happiness as it is only by being happy within the world we live in that can make us productive and grounded. I am going to quote from the article whilst I give it my twist. It will be more like 10 simple things you can do to make you happier when you are an adrenaline pushed, perfectionist and honest to a fault kind of being.
Exercise more is the first suggestion. It is suggested that 7 minutes could be sufficient. I agree totally as the last 7 days have been exercise free for me because of a back condition and I never realised how happier I felt after trudging on the treadmill for 40 minutes at 6km an hour. The happy hormones released were sufficient for the day. The article states: Exercise has such a profound effect on our happiness and well-being that it’s actually been proven to be an effective strategy for overcoming depression and I second that wholly. Exercise can help you to relax, increase your brain power. The article gives scientific proof of that. I would just like to add from my personal experience that you have to sort of switch off from the world and my way of doing that is by listening to a medley of songs I liked from age 10 onwards played randomly and which take me on an incredible time travel bringing smiles of my face as I sing along. In the span of 40 minutes I veer from becoming a child, to a teenager, to a woman and back to being a child. It is exhilarating. Try it. I guess the added time travel bit with music blaring so loud in my years that it shuts present is an added plus point.
Sleep more. That has never been a problem with Ranjan. I am the one who sleeps erratically and all tensed up. Once upon seeing my toes all stretched Ranjan thought I was pretending to sleep but when he tried to wake me up, he realised I was sound asleep, though my sleep is so light that any movement or noise has me jumping up. Sleep it is said in the article, is important to our happiness. It goes on to say that negative stimuli get processed by the amygdala; positive or neutral memories gets processed by the hippocampus. Sleep deprivation hits the hippocampus harder than the amygdala. The result is that sleep-deprived people fail to recall pleasant memories, yet recall gloomy memories just fine. Now to the question how much we should sleep. Eight ours is a myth. An article on the subject states that “people who sleep between 6.5 hr. and 7.5 hr. a night, live the longest, are happier and most productive” What’s even more interesting here is that sleeping longer than that might actually be worse for your health mentioning that: “Sleeping 8.5 hr. might really be a little worse than sleeping 5 hr.”
A little aparte for the sleep deprived person . Whether we are sleep deprived or not, we lose focus at times. And that is precisely where the sleep deprived person lands in a trap.The person bragging that they only slept 4 hours and still do great work, well, they are actually right with what they are saying. The only issue is that, they have no brainpower to steer them back to focus once they lose attention. Even worse so, sleep-deprived people don’t notice their decrease in performance.
Napping is an excellent habit. 20 minutes is all you need. And if you have a sleep problem, develop a sleep ritual. First you need an activity that disengages you from the every day work: it could be a late evening walk, playing with your kid though the kid often sleeps before you, listening to your favourite music with earphones, read fiction or poetry what is most important is to go to bed straight after this ritual. And have a clear ritual for you wake up time too. No matter what time I sleep, I get up at the same time and after a wash say my prayers, come down to my office and after lighting a lamp in the outside alter I sit at my computer and put on my mantra tape and spend time with myself.
The next simple thing to do to gain happiness is according to the same article: is move closer yo your work as a short commute is better than a big house. This does not apply to those I know but the logic given is the following: Our commute to the office can have a surprisingly powerful impact on our happiness. The fact that we tend to do this twice a day, five days a week, makes it unsurprising that its effect would build up over time and make us less and less happy. I leave to you to decide upon this one.
Another ingredient in the happiness recipe is to Spend time with friends and family – don’t regret it on your deathbed. There is a lot of good sense in this. I have come to realise this after Ranjan's illness.
The next item on the menu is go outside happiness is maximized at 13.9°C. Wonder how that works in a country like India.
Next comes the one I can swear by. Help others – 100 hours a year is the magical number. My life changed in 2000 when I met Manu and decided to do something for him. Since I have never felt happier. The trick is to dirty your hands and not just write a cheque. It makes you happier to help others and can change your life for the better in more ways than you can imagine.
Smile is the next thing on the agenda! Smiling is a science. Smiling stimulates our brain’s reward mechanisms in a way that even chocolate, a well-regarded pleasure-inducer, cannot match. Smiling can change our brain, through the powerful feedback loop we discussed above. And your brain keeps track of your smiles, kind of like a smile scorecard. It knows how often you’ve smiled and which overall emotional state you are in therefore. So crate your smile bank and make huge deposits in it. Smile whenever you can, even on the street to an unknown person and see the magic.
The next suggestion is a strange one but one that I can again vouch for as I am the greatest armchair traveller in the Universe. Plan a trip – but don’t take one! Have you never experienced the fact that planning for something that brings happiness is the best part of the exercise. As opposed to actually taking a holiday, it seems that planning a vacation or just a break from work can improve our happiness. The highest spike in happiness comes during the planning stage of a vacation as employees enjoyed the sense of anticipation. One study found that people who just thought about watching their favorite movie actually raised their endorphin levels by 27 percent! So plan an event and whenever you need a boost in happiness think about it. No wonder I the eternal planner am so happy!
Now comes the tricky one: Meditate. I have tried forever and find myself planning things whilst supposedly meditating. Meditation literally clears your mind and calms you down, it’s been often proven to be the single most effective way to live a happier life. Must give it yet another go. Mediation does wonders to you: it reduces anxiety, helps you to focus better, makes you more creative, more compassionate and so on. Must make Ranjan do it and try it myself too, It may prevent the meltdown lurking round the corner.
And last of all, practice gratitude. I have made my motto: busy being grateful and it has helped. I am grateful for everything the good or the bad. My father was a real bhakti yogi. His prayer went something like that: I am grateful for all You have given me, the good and the bad. I know that you will steer me out of all the challenges that you have sent my way. I will simply continue being grateful and praising you. Now it is for you to keep the faith of one who has surrendered everything to you. And it worked. I have been a witness to that. The article puts like this : There are lots of ways to practice gratitude, from keeping a journal of things you’re grateful for, sharing three good things that happen each day with a friend or your partner, and going out of your way to show gratitude when others help you.
The article ends with this statement: Getting older will make yourself happier. I am getting there!
I would again like to end with the serenity prayer:
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.
--Reinhold Niebuhr
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