Musings

It has been a while since I have not updated this blog though before I go into my rants and raves, let me assure you that Ranjan is doing well. He even went for a one night business trip and wonders of wonders did not forget to have his medicines or mix them up as he did in the past. I still remember the day when he called me up and said that he had had his morning medicines at night! It is hard to do this as I give him neatly marked packets and instructions and when possible call him or SMS him when it is pill time. This time he was spot on. But it was only one night out. He has to go for 5 nights out end of next month and I am wrecking my brain to work out the way in which I will need to pack his medication. I am also worried about his food as there is no way I can get him organic food in Calcutta, I rang up the hotel where he stayed last and asked them if they had 'organic' food and pat came the reply: yes Ma'am we have 'oriental' food. So must give him instructions about what to eat and what not to eat within the choices available at Golf Clubs and hotels. This I guess is also part of the new normal I have been talking about for some time now. Will get to that soon.

Ranjan has been complaining about losing his college day weight. It had reached 67 kilos at its nadir and though he felt kicked about fitting in my jeans, he looked like death warmed up. he is now back to his normal weight hovering around 75 kilos and this morning Doc Paul told me that putting on weight was one of the most positive things that could happen.

As I said we are getting used to our new normal. For the next 5 months or so there are no earth shattering medical tests, just a few routine blood counts. The next one is on Feb 10th. So the new normal is actually trying to put into practice all the research I have done. Some things are easy: nutrition, supplements etc. Others more difficult. Whereas Ranjan has begun mild exercise today - Hurrah - as till date he kept complaining of the cold, the yoga, breathing, grounding, meditating and reversing the negative loop are appearing to be quite a challenge. So my day is spent nagging and my partner in crime in this is Agastya my grandson who never forgets to ask his nanou if he has jumped on the trampoline the required number of times, and either makes him jump there and then while keeping a watchful eye, or makes and angry face and gets off Skype. This works. Actually I think I may just ask his help for the yoga, meditation etc.

I too am trying to find my new normal and have to do so without help as it is all in my head. The days seems empty. I need to kick myself and get back to writing my second book that is half way through. I also need to start thinking of the future of project why. Above all I must start ignoring the elephant in my head: the June scan and its results.

I will get there. I have to. When and how remains to be seen.