Bucket list item no 1: all I know till now

In my last post I stated rather passionately that I would live each day as if it was my last! So let us walk the talk. so if today was the last day of my life, the most important thing that needs to be done is to share all the information I have in my head concerning Ranjan's day-to-day care and well being. I am putting this in the 'public' domain as I know there are many across the world who hare caring for dear ones with cancer and hope that the knowledge - a big word I agree - I have gained could be of use to them, should they want to follow my way.

To put things in context, this is my third if not fourth brush with cancer. My first one was when my Nani was diagnosed with liver cancer way back in 1957. My memories is that of a worried mom, a hurried trip to India - we were in Rabat - and a telegram on July 13th 1958 saying she had passed on. I was 6. Cancer was often talked about but to a growing teen it meant nothing. What mattered was getting passed papa with a short skirt and Twiggy eye lashes without being admonished. Somewhere along the way 2 lumps in ma's breast brought the beat lurking, but it kept at bay. It was in 1989 or so that we all knew Ma had cancer though the word was never whispered. She wanted it that way. She lived on bravely and died on her own terms. Papa somatised her cancer and was diagnosed on October 30th 1992 with cancer of the colon, had surgery on November 5th and left me on November 29th.

We moved to Paris and on a visit to a doctor for some silly ailment, I was told that I was high risk and that I had to have a yearly check up. Sorry! I was not at willing to live life from check up to check up. This was 1992. A chance meeting with a young woman with cancer open my world to alternative therapies and with the arrival of the Internet and Sir Google, I started my personal cancer research. Right from the outset I intuitively sensed that chemotherapy and radio therapy were not for me. It was not the vanity of losing hair, but the vague feeling that it was poison. I knew simply  I would follow mama's footsteps with a caveat: pain management if the beast were to attack me. I must confess that I always thought I would be at the receiving end.

I began eating healthy, rainbow diets, giving up milk products though I occasionally binged on cheese, taking supplements and reading every book I could lay my hands on where people had beaten cancer with alternative medicine. I had a small fright almost a decade ago and I knew that if I opted for conventional medicine then I would be drawn into an infernal spiral. Thank God someone had mentioned a Tibetan Doctor. It was a eureka moment for me. When I met her I was attracted by this spunky woman who radiated a sense of well being. I shared my history with her, my terrifying fright of having cancer. When she suggested a blood test, I burst into tears and told her I trusted her and would take all her medicines and did not want to know anything else. It has been 10 years and I religiously swallow her pills and powders and meet her at least once a month for what is to me a full body scan. She specialises in cancer and has had many success stories. You can find her contact details here.

My cancer never came, or if it did it remained in the brain of Dr D who must have cured it. I was happy that I had found the doctor I dreamt of! Then Ranjan got sick. He lost weight, appetite, had slight fever occasionally, and somewhat began to fade away. I must admit that my dread of the word C may have delayed diagnosis though I do believe that we took all the steps required. But please if you have a dear one who starts losing weight, has low fever and blood counts falling think cancer. The way you deal with it is your decision, and only yours. Do not get seduced by what doctors tell you. My Pa was told he would be up and about in 15 days!

When Ranjan was diagnosed with Hodgkin's lymphoma, I rushed to Dr D hoping that she would tell me she had the cure. Instead she told me in her inimitable way that Hodgkin's Lymphoma, testicular cancer and one of the leukaemia responds well to chemotherapy. I was stunned. I realised in that fleeting moment that the one thing I had always wanted to keep away from our lives had surreptitiously found a crack to enter it. Dr D also said that she would give her medication to boost immunity and ward off the bad side effects. So Ranjan has her medicine 4 times a day and should anyone want to contact her, here is the address:
D-10  Kalkaji, Delhi 110019
(91)-(40)-23309811

The next thing I learn about cancer is the importance of nutrition. It is important to give up the things that cancer cells do not like and feed the body with food they hate. The things to give up are sugar, white rice, white flour, white everything! All dairy products and all non vegetarian food. Fish is acceptable as long as you try and find a low mercury one. Though its is a huge environmental foot print, I buy his fish in a shop called The Taste, in Defence Colony and some of it comes from Chile! Organic vegetables are available and delivered to your home, so our other items like dals, red rice, spices, oils organic flour etc. I source mine from the following stores
I say organic
Altitude Store
Earth Organic
There are other options if you google for them. But I have found these stores friendly and efficient. Altitude Store also has breads and farm eggs and organic chicken and lamb.

Of course if the patient has strong preferences, it is a bit of a juggling game as is the case with me. Ranjan does not like some vegetables like squashes and pumpkins so one has to be very creative. The idea is to give as many different coloured fruits and vegetables every day.

Vegetable and fruit juices are essential and you can mix and match to your heart's content and hide all the things you know will be rejected: fresh turmeric, amla, cabbage, broccoli, beetroot, kale, radish etc. Ginger is a must.

Next come berries of all shades and hues. I again get my frozen ones from The Taste in Defence Colony. Cranberries and Blueberries are a must. I usually make a smoothie with silken tofu.

Seeds of all kind and specially linseed oil are very good so I put them in cereals and smoothies.

Another thing I give Ranjan twice a day is pure Ashwagandha Root Powder with honey. This is difficult to get as it is often mixed with other plants. The best place to get it in Delhi at Kottakkal Arya Vaidya Sala , Karkar Duma , Delhi but you need to insist that you want pure root powder and not churnam. This works wonders with immunity levels and side effects of chemo.

Next is sour sop. A fruit that I must have eaten in large quantities when we were posted in Saigon in the early sixties. It is somewhere between a jack fruit and a durian! The best way is to get leaves and bark and boil it and then drink three glasses a day. I source mine from Alavi Herbs in Hyderabad. They are efficient and send you the leaves once you have deposited the money in their bank.

Everyone is talking of the magic of Apricol Kernels also known as vitamin B17! Alavi herbs supplies these too. You can of course learn more about these on the net before deciding to add them to your regimen. However if you want Vitamin B17 supplement you would have to order them from abroad.

Mushrooms are known to help cancer patients. Some of the exotic ones are available at  INA market or some fancy vegetable shops but you can also go for supplements that are available on line.

I also give Ranjan Salvestrol which I did not find in India. I am blessed to have friends who order it and send it to me. You can imagine how much juggling it takes to handle all this. We are booked from 6 am to 9pm!

This was the nutrition story. If I find more I will share it immediately.

Most of the bad side effects are kept at bay with all these brews and stews, but some may still appear. We had some blisters in the mouth. Now the antidote to that is to make the patient suck ice as long as the chemo cocktail is being poured into his system. It is not easy but coax your loved one, it works miracles. Nails turning blue are also a sign of the poison finding its way in all places. Cold gloves are available outside idea but two bags of frozen peas work as well. Ranjan was not very cooperative but I hope I can convince him. I also feed him home made food even though it is not allowed in the hospital that sells fast food! But the two times he had the hospital food he was sick so I am willing to break the law.

Another important part of my arsenal is to make the elephant in the room a mouse. I must admit there are times when it does loom large, but we have learnt to squat it by laughter and humour. Ranjan has an iPad full of all his favourite old funny sitcoms and he often watches them. We also talk about Zozo or Mr H as we call his cancer lightly. One of the side effects I could not help with was loss of hair and he has lost quite a lot on his body. I remind him how one of my sina que non conditions was to marry a hairy man. So beware we have a cause for divorce!

Breathing is very important as cancer cells hate oxygen. We are still fighting over this one. And by the way I forgot the trampoline. Believe it or not rebounding - jumping on a trampoline - is a fab way to boost your immune system. Try it!

What you need is to overload your life with positive thoughts and throw out all the negative ones. Just meet people who make you laugh and shun those who are feed on your energies. Do not feel compelled to entertain any one you do not want around. People who care will understand.

So now I have written it all down. I may have forgotten some things and will write them down as soon as I remember. There maybe new things I add in my cornucopia as I go along. Will also make sure I share them.

In case anyone wants more information please email me at anouradha.bakshi@gmail.com and do forward this to anyone you know who is battling cancer.