To live is to be slowly born

“A single event can awaken within us a stranger totally unknown to us. To live is to be slowly born” wrote Antoine de St Exupery. It is strange but the trails and tribulations of the passed 18 months have certainly brought to life a 'stranger' unknown to me. But more than that it revived  a relationship that began almost 4 decades ago. The stranger I refer to is me, and the relationship is of course the one with Ranjan. True we are older and a bit faded, but the past months have seen us closer than we ever were. We are slowly being reborn every day we live, in spite or rather because of the unwanted and unsolicited stranger that has crept between us. However I have made sure that no space exists between Ranjan and I, and hence Sir Hodgkin's has to deal with the both of us. For the past 6 months I have shared every moment of his troubling presence in a way I could not have imagined. That is the new me, or the stranger I refer to. I must admit I did not know I was capable of this and feel blessed.

For better or worse, in sickness and health, vows we hear so often have really come alive in this experience we today share. And ultimately it is  moments of crisis and adversity that put your love and commitment to test. I saw this in my father when Mama has cancer and did not want any treatment. He stood by her wishes and tended to her as you would to a child, respecting all her demands and idiosyncrasies, the most poignant one being her insistence on not going to sleep unless he sat by her and woke her up every 45 minutes. You see she did not want to die in her sleep. Today I truly understand him and hope I too can stand by Ranjan all the way.